Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Indian Double-Flute

On Thu, Nov 4, 2010 at 7:40 AM, xxx Environmental LLC wrote:

Dear Matthew Green,

Your statement is attached. Please remit payment at your earliest convenience.
Thank you for your business - we appreciate it very much.

xxx Environmental, LLC

Statement Summary
Statement #: 1330
Statement Date: 11/04/2010
Open Balance: $1,500.00
From: Matthew Green
Sent: Thursday, November 04, 2010 8:56 PM
To: billciancaglini@xxx.com
Subject: Re: Statement from xxx Environmental, LLC

Thank you for the bill. I wish I could pay you, but I'm completely out of money. I am however very skilled at playing the algoza, or the "Indian double flute". In lieu of payment, would you accept payment in the form of a unique song that I can play to you over the phone with my Indian flute? I'll allow you to record the song on your answering machine so that you can play it back for others, and I promise you'll be satisfied. If this isn't satisfactory, I can also paint a very convincing picture of a turkey by using my hand. We're approaching thanksgiving, and its always a treat to see a high quality hand turkey.

On Fri, Nov 5, 2010 at 8:17 AM, Bill Ciancaglini wrote:
Funny – I guess a lawsuit is in order – jail would be nice for the Holidays
From: Matthew Green
Date: Fri, Nov 5, 2010 at 7:59 PM
Subject: Re: Statement from XXX Environmental, LLC
To: Bill Ciancaglini

Jail? There is absolutely no reason for you to go to jail. I know you think you're getting an unbelievable deal by getting both a hand turkey, and a personalized algoza song, but its certainly not a crime.

I'm still working things out, but the song is going to go something like this:

Billlllllll Billlll Billlll
From XXX Environmentalllllllll
Thats where Bill is frommmmm

He likes to send emails to peopleeeeee
Even if he doesn't know who is sending them tooooo

Let me know what you think.

A different Matthew Green

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